Showing posts with label Social. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Social. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

In Defense of "The Indian Gentleman"

I am an Indian woman, liberal, educated and very much vocal about women's rights.

I am also the daughter of, a sister to, and the wife of, extremely decent, responsible and caring Indian men and I have many male friends whom I am proud to call  "friend".

I am also a woman who deeply cares and is very aware about the pathetic condition in which Indian women are treated and the endless harassments they face at home, at work and generally everywhere, almost at each step in their lives.

I am writing this post because, there recently has been another incident of Rape in India and this time in the financial capital of Mumbai and it has shaken the entire country once more. There has been much said in the popular as well as the social media about the attitude and the mindset of Indian men and about how, we should, as a society try and change it.

It is true that Indian men, a large enough portion of them have rather medieval attitude towards women, in fact almost all our social laws, tradition and customs have been designed in such a way so as to keep our women languishing at the bottom of the social hierarchy.

Have you noticed how women are scrutinized before marriage, even now, when most of the women are independent and earning (sometimes even more or equal as their male counterparts) and how much emphasis does being "fair", "slender", "convent educated" etc play in arranged marriages ? The matrimonial adverts are teeming with these words and it's disgusting.

But the greater question is:  Are only "Indian Men" responsible for such attitudes?

A society as a whole always reflect the attitudes and perceptions of the people who "make up" the society and this includes both men and women.

I would go as far to say that our Indian women are equal or more than responsible for how the Indian society treats its women. In fact, the other day, I was talking to my brother and he remarked that he's really tired of being generalized as the common Indian "man" who leches and assaults and rapes women, as if all men in India are such. The way our popular and social media goes about asking to change Indian men's perception is really disgusting and moreover it is utterly false. True, we have some of the most harshest and unequal traditions and customs in place to keep Indian women down and out... but are solely Indian men responsible for that ?

Whenever a woman is mistreated, raped or harassed, the first claim of innocence from the accused comes from the mother... has anyone noticed that ? Even in the Mumbai rape case, the mother of the accused has stood up for the accused and has claimed that "her son", the rapist, is actually "an extremely innocent boy and is also underage"... whenever there are domestic violent acts perpetrated, there is always a "mother-in-law", a "sister-in-law" or at least an "aunt" involved.... recently a petty Bollywood actor was accused of raping his domestic, and the first claim of innocence came from the actor's wife, who went as far as saying that the charges were fabricated, when there had already been medical proof to the contrary.

Attitudes such as this, strengthens and emboldens the attitude of the society as a whole and then, when the society perpetrates that perception, we call it wrong, disgusting and unjustified.

Most of the soaps in Indian mainstream television focus on either a housewife getting ill treated at her in-laws hands, or a daughter who is striving very hard to uplift her family from distress, facing embarrassments and overcoming them or an "all sacrificing" daughter-in-law who despite being treated harshly, repents, forgives and gets harshly treated again by her in-laws. Some of these soaps even focus on how a "dark", or "fat", or an otherwise "not so beautiful girl" not getting suitable suitors for marriage. And in ALL OF THEM, the main negative protagonist is also A WOMAN....

And what's worse, there are millions of women, housewives or otherwise, watching these soaps who get influenced by these moronic ideas.

I have grown up in a family where I have three brothers, and all of them are as decent as men could possibly be. My brother, who is also my best friend, is one of the most decent ,man I have till date seen in my life. In fact Indian men are rather, far better, if you compare them to men from other communities and classes such as Blacks or Hispanics. They are far more protective and caring of their family and far less prone to abandoning their duties and responsibilities. I have had several uncles, who has never, in anyway tried to impede on my dignity and I have worked with some of the best male colleagues that one could ever get and my Boss, who incidentally was a man was one of the best bosses ever... I have had male friends who have been extremely decent, not only towards me but also to all the girls/ladies in their life. I have married an extremely decent and an admirable Indian man, who has never once pressured me to do anything, that I haven't wanted to do. I have known some of my girl friend's husbands and they too have been really decent.

Contrary to this, I have also known many a groping men in public buses and strangers, of course, male, on the roads who eyes first travel from my chest area upto my face and then downwards again.

I have also known mother-in-laws who talk about their daughter-in-laws with contempt and ridicule and I have known mothers who have been beset with woes because of their daughter's failure to find a suitable match. I have known " family aunts" and "neighborhood aunties", whose interest in someone's daughter's marriage exceeds her own parent's enthusiasm... I have known female colleagues bitching about other female colleagues and I have also known a female Boss giving less than deserving appraisals to her female juniors.

So my dear readers, there are millions of decent, nice, caring and respectful men in India. These men are considerate, they respect your identity as a woman, and they are freethinking enough to respect your liberty.

As opposed to a hundred lecherous, morally degenerated, abusive, Indian men, there are also several hundreds, nice, decent and caring Indian men and as opposed to many thousands oppressed, ill treated, and abused Indian women, there are also several hundred oppressive, abusive and rather cruel Indian women...

It is a rather sad truth, but it is a truth.

Till the day, we women do not support our own, till the day, we do not do not look into a man's or a woman's eyes if they are treading on our women's rights, we should not blame the Indian male solely for the atrocities permeated on the Indian women. Till the day, women will keep shielding their male relatives for their ill treatment to other women, and till the day we do not impart the same teachings to our daughters and sons regarding women rights and dignities, blaming Indian men and their attitudes, would not help Indian women better their position in the society in any way.

It's best to remember the very famous words, "if men are the heads, women are the necks, whichever way the neck turns, the head too has to turn in the same way"...  So let's be responsible "necks",
my dear women, let's turn the "heads" the right way...

Image Courtesy: www.someecards.com


Wednesday, July 10, 2013

My Life as a Wanderlust : The Black, The Grey and The White...

It's almost been three months of stay for me and my husband here in South Africa.
 Before taking a trip down here, there are two things which we searched about the most.

First, of course, the places to visit and secondly, Indian Restaurants ( as I mentioned in an earlier blog post, we are foodies of the greatest nature).

About the first, we haven't been to any of the famous places that one would normally come across while Goggling "South Africa", but I managed to go to the one place that I was hell bent on and which really shook us, it instilled a feeling in us about the place where we are living and the legacy it carried for all of us.

The place I am talking about is the Apartheid Museum. Anybody who has been to South Africa or plan to visit South Africa, trust me, your journey would remain half complete if you don't visit this place. I am a huge history buff so wherever I go, I make sure that I read some of the nations' history, otherwise not knowing about the country, about it's people, about the legacy, makes me feel incomplete.

We have all heard of the heinous practice of Apartheid which was taken and practiced as a State Policy here in South Africa and the practice ended only in 1991. A lot of my friends of Facebook, didn't know that Apartheid ended only in 1991, this is extremely recent for people of our age... I mean we were all in school at the time... Anyhow when I had first heard of the place, I made sure, that this was a "must see" on my list.

I am giving below the link of the Museum's site, if anyone is interested in finding out more, and really the more you know, the more will you be surprised.

http://www.apartheidmuseum.org/

The first thing that strikes you is that the tickets that are given randomly distinguish people into Whites and Non-Whites... no there is nothing racial about it, me and my husband are both Asian, we got two tickets, one labelled "White" (Blanke in Afrikaans) and "Non-White" ( Nie-Blanke) and then we had to go through separate doors titled the same, into a tunnel kind of exhibition... this act in itself strikes you as extremely discriminating... it did to me, but that's exactly what used to happen down here. Then there is a passageway and an exhibition showing us enlarged posters of the "Identity cards" that people carried. The thing that felt strange to me was, besides name,  and gender, there was the "Ethnic" grouping. Also there was a group called "the chameleons" well, surprising as it may sound, the Apartheid Government termed the Citizens of the country so in 1985. This group of people officially changed their Ethnicity  from either "Indians" to Coloured, Coloureds to Indians, Malays to Coloured and so on...

When we emerge from this horrendous passage, we are re-united with our co-passengers, who had been passing through another similar tunnel... We emerged into an open courtyard where the Johannesburg sun was shinning down... it felt like a breadth of fresh air... the sensation after passing through a tunnel, the exhibits of which keep reminding you of your Ethnicity, to say the least, is not at all pleasant. I just imagined, what might have been the situation for this country's citizens who had to carry those evil cards at all times which shrieked out distinction and you could do nothing about it...

There were many, many similar exhibits stating the history of South Africa. The settlement of the Dutch colonists on the western capes of the country, who first trekked up the Highvelds into the interior to set up cities such as Johannesburg and Pretoria, how the English came later and the beginning of the Apartheid ideology which started as an innocent idea to preserve the culture, tradition and the history of the first "Afrikaan" people and then turned into an heinous practice and later into a hated state policy.

As one passes through the museum, one is time and again reminded of the differences that exist among us, and also reminds us, that it is these differences which unites us rather than divide us... Sure we are different, each and every individual is different, but it is this, that makes us "humans" , if we were all same, we would rather have been machines...

At the end of all the exhibitions, there is a place, a kind of forest with a huge man-made lake, the clear waters of the lake reflect back at you and you realize whatever our race may be, whatever our color, whatever our language may be, and whatever our religion, we still are "human beings" and that's the only thing that's worthy about us.

A visit to this place actually makes you evaluate your humanity. It drills into you that no matter how bad the conditions may be, there can still be hope for better...



Monday, March 11, 2013

Mr. Chetan Bhagat, kudos to you... Celebrating the "Working, Career-Oriented Woman"...

Today I came across a blog, sharply criticizing Mr. Chetan Bhagat's take on why men should choose career oriented woman over a home maker.

This particular article, written by Mr. Bhagat in the Times of India, had gathered a huge number of "likes" on Facebook and had many "shares" to it's credit.

This particular author went on to criticize Mr. Bhagat's take on home makers in her blog.

Mr. Chetan Bhagat's article, I am sure, most of my women readers read it and shared it likewise, was a practical take on why men would do better to marry a career oriented woman. For reasons unknown, my fellow blogger totally missed the point.

Mr. Bhagat, I am definitely sure, (and please I am not being paid by Mr. Bhagat or The Times for writing this...) targets men as well as women in his article, people who are  ( I am hoping), educated enough to read an English daily, and also independent financially, otherwise, the article would make no sense...

And therein lies the answer to why this article was extremely important to its readers.

His idea was not to crticise "housewives", who form an extremely important strata in our society, but rather the idea that a working woman could not not be a good home maker... this was the central idea of the article, and in criticism of which, my dear fellow blogger completely missed her perspective.

Whatever critics may say, the most important indicator of women's liberation is her financial independence.

Historically if we see, marriages conducted between powerful families and women of reputable dynasties were given a totally different status, as compared to those who came from poor alliances. In fact Akbar's wife Jodha Bai, or Harka Bai, his chief wife, for most of his reign, came from a very reputable dynasty and was an essential pillar of Akbar's idea of separating religion from governance.

In India, many hundreds of middle class and upper middle class families, even now have this idea, that if a career oriented woman comes into the family as the "bahu", household work would be neglected as she would be busy with her career. This happens in really educated and wealthy households too. Therefore, nowadays, there is a surprising trend. If the guy happens to earn fairly a good salary, his parents look for a home maker, a girl, with convent education, from decent families, having higher end degrees, but willing to be a home maker.

This is one of the most widely spread matrimonial demands of prospective Indian grooms and in-laws.

Most importantly, a woman is first and foremost an individual, and therefore, she has the complete right of choosing whether to be a working, career oriented woman or a home maker.

Now, there is another class of women too... those who have willingly made a choice to be a home maker. I fall in that category, and unfortunately, this blogger, whom I am criticizing  does so too... These are the women, who have higher end degrees, and they very capable of earning a livelihood, often times, a better livelihood than that of their spouses, but they have chosen to be home makers.This choice in no way demeans them or their spouses and they are, I believe, in the minority.

To be in this class, you have to belong to that affluent section of the population, where you know, that your spouse can provide for you and/or your child all the benefits and facilities, that a double income earning family can afford. Then you have the choice of not working and looking after the household. It's as simple and practical as that. Also mind you, this decision to become a home maker, has to be solely the woman's alone, not that of her husband, or her in-laws or her parents. This section of women, trust me, fall into a very "affluent" section of the population, "affluent", because, they have a choice in this regard.

After all, as Mr, Bhagat, pointed out, in an age of expenses, a double income earning family, stands way better than single income earning household. Its so true and immensely practical.

Therefore I am totally for marrying career oriented women and working women, rather than unemployed ones. When I was dating my husband, even I was an extremely busy career woman and therefore I respect them immensely.

But unfortunately, this choice is often denied to many women.

Women are either told to give up their jobs or to temper down their career ambitions because of matrimonial responsibilities.

I have a friend in Pipariya, a small town in Madhya Pradesh, who is independent, earning a healthy income and living alone in Mumbai. Unfortunately, her parents have been unable to find a guy suitable for her, because of the fact that she's earning... this still happens in India, mind you.

I also know of another woman, who lives in USA, here in Overland Park, and earns more than her husband. She's a dear friend of mine and she's the best home maker I have seen.

I do not think being a home maker is demeaning, but I do wholeheartedly support Mr. Bhagat's idea of marrying a working woman rather than an un-employed one and I also support the idea of being a career-oriented woman or a working woman rather than a mere home-maker.

If at any stage of my life, I feel, I have had enough as a home maker, I should have the choice to resume the mantle of a working woman and vice versa. This choice, is crucial in the debate of "Home Makers VS Working Wives" and would be the true indicator of women's liberty and empowerment.

And mind you, no one in the world, has a right to tell a woman to give up on her job or diminish her career ambitions, unless, he/she has provided her with the particular job.

Trust me, having been both a career woman, and an home maker now, I truly believe that a working girl, will bring a perspective to the marriage, which is far better than marrying your average "stay-at-home" girl or having a home maker as a wife.

Unfortunately prospective Indian grooms and their parents have a long way to go to understand this.

And my dear ladies... career oriented ones and home makers, please stop critising the few Indian males, like Mr. Bhagat, who have taken up cudgels of  promoting our rights, you are only harming yourself and us...




Wednesday, December 19, 2012

An Ardent Appeal to Indian Men and Women...

A 23 year old woman was raped heinously and left naked on the roads of Delhi on Sunday...

Yes, another rape case, since the last one was reported, let's see, ah... oh yes... a month ago ????

So readers, what's new, rape cases aren't the big thing... they just keep happening in our country...

Well it's a pretty common crime actually... you see, all Indian men, feel they have a natural obligation to condemn, judge and violate a female....

Don't you agree, ok, let's speak stats then...

One woman in India suffers sexual molestation in the form of rape or sexual abuse every 22 minutes... isn't that like wow...!!!

There have been 24,206 reported rape cases in 2011, according to the National Crime Records.

The actual number of rape cases is five times than that of those reported, because most of the cases that take place go unreported.

There has been an increase of 792 percent in rape cases in India, over the last two decades.

Yiiiipppeeee people, what if we can't top in any other fields like health, sanitation, education, sports... we do top in rape cases...

Every time a rape takes place in India, people get outraged, some go out on a candle light vigil, some write on Facebook walls, others like me, vent out their anger on personal blogs...

 Media channels vie each other on anti rape propaganda, and politicians get a chance to pay "holier than thou" visits to the rape victims and their families....

And then when some of these unfortunate women die, oh yes, our Government doles out payments to their family members as compensation for living in a near barbaric society....

And then after the two weeks' hullabaloo, everything quietens down, until another rape case happens and we are again re-awakened to the semi barbaric society that we live in...

This blog is an ardent appeal to men : Father, Brothers, Husbands, Boyfriends... whoever you are, please, please respect women...

Not just your wives, or mothers, or sisters or your girlfriends, but that woman you see down the road... yes, she looks hot, but she doesn't want to get raped... yes that lady in the bus, yes she does have a cheeky buttock, but she doesn't want it to be pinched... yes, that chick in hot pants.... she doesn't like being wolf whistled...

Only our men, when they know and respect the fact, that a woman is just not a "pair of boobs"... or a "measurement"... or a "toy", can the rape cases come down...

Woman, be brave, don't be afraid to slap that fellow in the bus who's looking at what he shouldn't be looking at...

Don't be scared of crying out aloud, when you feel an elbow nudging in your rib cage...

Don't be afraid to carry a pepper pellet... and please feel free to use it...

This is your country too, don't forget  that you are far more stronger than the man who leers at you...

To every Indian men, who leer and lech at every attractive girl, in every city of India, big, or small, you guys are cowards, big, sad, cowards...

And to every Indian female, who suffer their stares silently, alas you are bigger cowards...

Rapes in India will keep increasing, will keep happening, perhaps, that's what Indian women deserves because sadly they were born in India...

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Nine Lives: Indian Spirituality Revisted


I have just finished reading another exceptional book by William Dalrymple, "Nine Lives : In Search of the Sacred in Modern India". It is an essential book, that anyone interested in India's unique culture and spirituality, should read.

It is a collection of nine stories from nine corners of India, on nine different personalities. What gives this book its unique character and feel, is the art of story telling. The voice of the characters is manifest here, and it is through them, that the reader is taken on a wonderful spiritual and humane journey.

The book opens with "The Nun's Tale", a touching story of a Jain nun. Jainism, a religion, founded by Mahavira, a contemporary of Buddha, is little known outside India. Even in India, it has a minuscule following of about six million as compared to the one billion following of Hinduism and five hundred million following of its contemporary religion, Buddhism. However, Jainism has the highest degree of literacy of any religious following throughout India and it is one of the most richest religion, based on per capita income. The Jain religion has an unique way to end life, called "salekhanna", which any Jain ascetic monk or even lay worshipers can embrace, if they feel, their time to end life has come.

The nun in the first story, is on her way to embrace "salekhanna", and we get a glimpse of her life, both as a lay Jain worshiper as well as a nun, in the monastic order. It is difficult to believe, that each and every character in this book, the chief nine protagonists are real men and women, who lead ordinary lives like us.

The most inspiring story I found was The Monk's Tale. It is the tale of a Buddhist monk, Tashi Passang, who now resides in Dharmashala, a Tibetan enclave in the state of Himachal Pradesh. This monk, had taken up arms in order to protect Tibet during the Chinese aggression of 1950, thus breaking one of the inviolable code of the Buddhist dharma, non violence. He was later drafted into the Indo-Tibetan Border Police,or ITBP, and helped India win the Indo-Pak war of 1972, out of which the present nation of Bangladesh was created.

His story is one of great resilience, and an inner-conflict, which plagued a monk and his path taken to come back and search the true meaning of Buddhism. It is indeed an awe inspiring story.

There is yet another story that comes from a region outside of India's political borders, but very much, within the vast spirit of the land, Sindh. This is the story of "Lal Pari", The Red Fairy, and tells the tale of a disciple of the Sufi saint Lal Shabaz Qalander. This lady, the "Lal Pari", is actually of Indian origin. How a simple, rural girl from the state of India, became a Sufi disciple in Pakistan, is not only interesting, but hair raising as well.

Each and every tale in this book, carries with it an unique human journey, the journey of human spirit, and you are left encouraged and inspired by the tales in this book. The stories, take the reader on a colourful journey of India, and the reader finds an inner conflict taking place in modern India, between the forces of development, reason and science, and the forces of spiritualism, religion and conventions. Somewhere, the reader starts empathizing with the characters in each of the tale.

As in the West, where people have lost their touch with their inner self, as religion and society becomes more and more materialistic, India is still trying to hold onto its roots of age old wisdom, conventions and religious beliefs, as they are more and more challenged by Western convictions.

An amazing work. I would urge each and every body, to take a little patience, (the book is 251 pages, excluding Glossary, Introduction and Index) and read Nine Lives. It will take you on a journey that is incredible like the land itself.



Monday, January 18, 2010

The Six Mistakes Of Man


1. The delusion that personal gain is made by crushing others.
2. The tendency to worry about things that cannot be changed.
3. Insisting that a thing is impossible because 'he' cannot accomplish it.
4. Refusing to set aside trivial preferences.
5. Neglecting development and refinement of mind, and not acquiring the habit of reading and study.
6.Attempting to compel others to believe and live as we do.

( Cicero)

Monday, September 28, 2009

The Magic of Festivities..


With the dawn of the autumn West Bengal and particularly Kolkata gears up to it's festive look...three different celebrations, three different communities, the Durga puja, the Eid, and then the Deepawali, but the spirit of celebrations and the festive mood of the people does not undergo any change. There is now a perspective change in how these three festivals are celebrated specially in Kolkata and especially Durga Pujo, clearly the Biggest of all the Bong Festivals, 5 days of unreined festivities and celebrations.
Kolkata is the city in transmission, it's slowly leaving it's post colonial hangover and it's over enthusiastic celebration of intellect and entering into that rat race of the newly liberalized and slowly globalizing counterparts like Bangalore, Delhi, Mumbai and so on. In the past five years or so numerous shopping plazas have sprouted up in the city and so has the associated umber of commercial ventures. The number of Call centers and Engineering firms and the increased avenues of income generation brought an overwhelming change in the habits and thinking pattern of the ordinary Kolkatans.
The early Kolkatan was a shy, intellectually innovative and introvert kinda guy, the new Kolkatan is raring to go, he now knows his worth and is out to squeeze every bit of his potential into making his lifestyle "happening"... and therefore as a consequence comes a change in how he celebrates.
If someone has been a witness to the celebrations of Kolkata, the reader will agree with me that our parents and gran parents viewed these celebrations as being great family occasions where long lost cousins would all gather under one roof and celebrate the essence of the occasion which were in the main strictly restricted to being religious. Though the festivals had much to do with enjoyment, still "religion" got to play a big role.
Now these have changed, first and foremost in an age of computers, the old timed pujo Holidays are a thing of past, you can always keep in touch with the big guy in Amsterdam through your Notebook, there's nothing like the old "Pujor chuti"... secondly long lost cousins aren't same anymore, they might just be your favorite Facebook pal, more closer to u than your own sibling, and "religion", ok anyone who says the word is a huge bigamist.... Nowadays the "new Kolkatan" celebrates in shopping malls, they munch on Mac chickens and KFC buckets, wear Nike and Reebok, are big on designer kurtas and choli blouses,Manish Malhotras and Shania NC are in vogue, they binge on Fosters and Colas and once in a while and if they are lucky they do still manage to go around that "happening" Pujo which attracts the sexiest "babes" and the handsome "hunks"....
The khichuri, pore bhaja, Luchi, begun bhaja routine has long been tossed up for the pizza CCD and Barista routine. Yes some still do the all night "pandal hopping" thing but how much Pandal hopping and how much beer guzzling happens is anyone's guess.
Oh and before i forget, the Mahaashtami's anjuli has become a "Ma, mashi" thing, it's just not happening enough... today is Dashmi...Devi Durga will be immersed with the hope that we'll get to see her again the year next but whether the mode of festivities change or the place of gathering, one thing is certain , the spirit will never be gone, whether one is in City Centre or in a sarbojonin Durga utsav the essence of celebration will always remain, this the the magic of festivities, atleast in Kolkata... Jai Dugga.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Maoist threat: Civil War in Bengal

West Bengal is being torn by civil war affecting mainly parts of rural Bengal. As if the cyclone Aila didn't cause enough harm by uprooting livelihood of many hundreds and thousands of poor villagers, the civil war is uprooting the very fabric of rural life in Bengal, none of the existing political parties in West Bengal is really interested in actually adressing the Maoist problem and the price for such indifference is being paid by the poor villagers. For many years these same Maoists were being supported and were being shielded by the ruling Communist Govt. going to the extent of supplying them with arms and ammunition taken from Police arsenal & now the same ruling coalition is facing the brunt of it's faulty policies. After the recent Lok Sabha election debacle it has begun to sit up and take notice of it's disastrous policies of retaining political power at any cost.

The main opposition Mamata Banerjee led Trinamool Congress is playing an even dangerous game.
It has long been known that Ms. Bannerjee has long wanted to take control of the West Bengal Govt and it's one of her most cherished desire to become the Chief Minister of the State, when the recent Lok Sabha Election showed that people are ready for a change, the Trinomool Congress started using the Maoists to further their political cause of replacing the ruling Left coalition. The PCPA is supported by the Trinomool Cong. and the atrocities being committed by them in the name of stopping the "Red threat" is actually to further both the Trinamool's and the Maoists' cause... it's indeed shameful and horrific to say the least. And in this political one upmanship, the poor people of rural Bengal is paying the price... they neither know the Left ideology, nor the Maoists' ideology nor do they have a clue as to what Ms. Banerjee wants. They are being killed, humiliated, raped, their houses are being set fire and their fields are being devastated... is anyone out there listening?

The so called Communists, the Maoists and Ms. Banerjee all of you who declare time and again in loud voices that they are for the "People of Bengal"... are you witnessing this silent genocide or do we need more bloodshed and tears to make you hear.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Jai Ho....!!!!!!

Many many congratulations to Mr. A.R. Rahman for attaining the distinction of being the only Indian to win 2 Oscars.And also heartiest congratulations to Mr. Danny Boyle and the cast and crew of Slumdog Millionaire.

It is a befitting reply to those who slammed the movie as 'Poverty porn'... it was said that all the movies which portray Indian poverty get accolades abroad...it was also said that poverty is the only thing which"sells".....to all these pessimists, either they haven't seen the movie or are far divorced from reality. As A.R Rahman said in his acceptance speech, "the film's message was one of eternal optimism".... it portrays the struggle of three orphans and their struggle for existence...yes poverty does exist in India and it is also true that all the films that have managed to cut ice with the broader audience has been on that track. But let's not take away the credits for a well made film. It is our misfortune that we haven't been able to make a film which portrays India's rich heritage and culture with equal aplomb as we have managed to depict poverty and malnutrition, though we may say in all "these films' " defense that they have essentially shown human trials and tribulations with poverty as their background which leads us to the question, why there haven't been movies which show the same human elements but in a different context.

That is because, sadly, right from the time when Mother India was nominated in the Foreign Films Category in the year 1958, poverty has been a matter of "necessary evil" for us, though now in the post liberalized India it has become a matter of "selective ignorance"... it's indeed sad to see movies still using that theme and making big bucks with the overseas audience.

But if we are to lay the blame on why the movie makers are making such movies it's the case of "pot calling the kettle black"....we have poverty and if movie makers use this background to show life's trials, who can we blame but us....for letting such gruesome poverty exist....and slamming others if they manage to portray the reality.....we turn away from it squeamishly for the sole reason because we can't face it.....so for the moment let's leave the poverty behind and rejoice in the cinematic brilliance that's "Slumdog Millioniare"...
JaiHo !!!

Image Courtesy : www.wikipedia.org

Friday, December 26, 2008

THE YEAR THAT WAS...

The year's coming to a close & soon we'll be stepping into 2009..isn't it amazing how far we've travelled in the new millenium.. 9 years!! 2008's been a far more troubled year of the 21st century for India..my readers will surely agree with me..no other year saw so many tragic happenings...the deadly terror attacks,the recession,the lay-offs...it seems everything bad had to happen this year.But there has to be a silver lining..ofcourse we won a Gold in the Olympics and our Cricket Team won the Tests against the Aussies...but I think the most important thing we evidenced is the unity being formed among the people of our country...it just grew stronger with every Terrorist Attack.It feels that we have matured a lot in a year...and it feels great to know that...The last evening I was with this group of frends who mostly treat "News" as being for "other people".But even they were discussing our politicians,our security apparatus,elections and stuff...there's this need to stand up and be counted..I personally think this unity and the sense of belonging to India was greatly missing among us...it's coming back,slowly but surely...
On the personal front mine too was a year of realization,be it career wise or other.I have matured up a lot and the best part have recognised certain lacunae on my part...I am now ready to be more responsible and as I mentioned earlier ready to be counted among...I can only say that I m happy to step into 2009 as a person who understands herself more clearly and is confident and determined to shape up her life as SHE wants it... WELCOME 2009..

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Women Are From Venus...

I came across an incident of marital violence some days ago...It was one of my frend...I had never ever expected she had any kind of past but she did and listening about it terrified me...it was horrendous...I kept thinking about it for a long long time...I have often observed..ofcourse a lot of my readers will disagree with me,that in any kind of relationship,the woman always, always are compromising more and more and more....they are the ones who always sacrifice and only some lucky ones are acknowledged...I m not saying that they sacrifice because they want the acknowledgement,they do it because they really care about their families....but what I m trying to say is perhaps..is there some kind of pschye that women carry,some kind of notion that just because they are women,they think it's their time honoured duty to put others interest ahead of herself.I guess she does because she really cares or maybe the society's attuned in such a way that makes a woman feel guilty if for once she cares about her own interests rather than that of others.There's this trailer of a sitcom that appears on the Colours channel in which a woman is shown asking a similar type of question that has been posed above.Maybe I have recently had a bad experience about hearing a rather unpalatable version of a marriage gone really bad that I m posing these kind of of questions or thinking this way...otherwise such has been the role of women since the dawn of history.Our Hindu mythologies have examples galore...Sita had to give the "agnipariksha" time & again to prove her loyalty and chastity, Gandhari of Mahabharata had to remain blindfolded throughout her life because her husband had been born a blind man, even Draupadi had to sacrifice her five sons inorder that her five husbands be saved! I m not saying these women did wrong,history would have been quite different if Sita refused to give her fire ordeal time & again and asked Ram for a change to face the fire ordeals hinself, if Gandhari refused to be blindfolded...maybe the great war itself wouldn't have taken place or if Draupadi had told her husbands to face the enemy instead of sacricing her sons!!!!!! Maybe the society expects women to sacrifice, to keep compromising time and again, maybe someone is needed to do a little sacrifice inorder that the social balance may be maintained... maybe that's why women are born, that's why they are the ones who can bring life forth and nurture it. Maybe just maybe she needs little more respect than she normally gets, a little more frequent acknowledgement of her immense capacity for selflessness.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Secularism: The Soul of India

India is a secular state,Pakistan is an Islamic state;so much is clear.But when we enter into the question deeply,we find some amount of confusion.A secular state is not one which does not recognise religious affinities of it's population,but the one which does not discriminate among them.

A secular state,in essence,should not discriminate among religions.In such a state,no citizen can claim or enjoy special facilities by virtue of his belonging to a particular religious community,nor can he be deprived of any civic or political right.Secularism is a modern idea.Even a hundred years ago in England,Jews and Roman Chatholics were discriminated against;they were ineligible for service under the state,or even for education in institutions under the state.It must be said to the credit of ancient India,that there never was any desire to impose relogious qualifications or disqualifications on any community as such.India has always given an honourable status to people of all religions.

In the modern world most civilised states are secular in a sense.Today,in no country is religion taken into consideration in politacal or other sphere of activity.

Secularism in the state has very great importance in our daily life.It has a social value which has it's own significance.In a secular state,society is more well knit and homogenous.The collective interest of the people has much less chance of being deflected into communal channels.This means strenght to the state.In a non secular state,in times of stress might find the people divided and disunited,but in a secular state this is far less possible.It also has an educational and cultural value.The citizens of a secular state have far greater realization of the interests of humanity.Their attitudes to the problems and demands of life are more humane and less abstract.It is a fact that if we allow a class or community to remain in an under privileged position,we become unresponsive to the human claims of the later and this has an adverse effect on our ways of thought and feelings which by no means should be encouraged.It creates a narrowness of outlook.We should make a psychologically strong state for the people to share the responsibilities of the corporate ethos.

Education should be strictly non religious and non sectarian.The modern world,under the influnce of sceintific antagonism has a more or less secular outlook on life.Religion no more colours our views on political or economic matters except in backward ir reactionary states.

We have had far too many outbreaks of communal passion to be complacent and allow the forces of reaction to take their own course.A positive step in the right direction would be to cultivate a scientific and ethical approach to our social problems-an essential prerequisite for the building up of a secular state.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

The Ideological Credence Of Terrorism

Terrorism: One of the words which have been used too much too many times in the recent past especially in India and is currently the favourite word of the two Presidential contenders in the USA.We all know the aim of terrorism,it is to spread terror or in more sophisticated terms violence in order to acheive the desired result.My question is do the "terrorist"(as they are called in the common parlence)adhere to any kind of ideology or their only motive is to ruthlessly kill people?Terrorism as a weapon to acheive the ends is not a new phenomenon,India has had a history of revolutionaries right from the Chapekar Brothers to Bhagat Singh who had been called "terrorists" by the British and 'revolutionaries' by their countrymen,who did use violence to make their griviences heard.But as Bhagath Singh time and again asserted,"Terrorism as an ideology cannot acheive much"so our freedom fighters moved from what has been called the "cult of Bomb" in the days of Khudiram to the "philosophy of bomb"in the times of Bhagat Singh and Sukhdev.The two had vastly different connotations.While the 'cult of bomb' did follow individual terrorist acts inspired by the Irish revolutionaries,the 'philosophy of bomb' just used terror as a weapon to make their demands meet..their explicit aim being not to harm any innocent whether native or foriegn,that was the reason when Bhagath Singh and B.Dutt threw the bomb in the Legislative Assembly,it was not meant to injure anyone but just give the pretence of a bomb blast.

Anyway we have since long travelled from the days of Bhagat Singh and entered into the times of Osama Bin Laden amd somewhere in that long journey,the ideology followed by the revolutionaries or teerorists as they are now known as have got lost.Today an act of terrorism does not potray anxieties of the opressed or the neglected minority,instead it manifests the destructive power of a few which destroys millions and orphans a few more.In a nutshell TERRORISM TODAY DOES NOT HAVE ANY IDEOLOGY OR THE TERRORISTS OF TODAY JUST TERRORISE PEOPLE FOR THEIR INDIVIDUAL GAINS.

The all pervesive question of how to contain terrorism has come up time and again and one answer everyone right from scholers to politicians agreed was the socio-economic upliftment of the backward and the neglected classes of the society from where it was found that the majority of people engaging in terror came from..but this does not hold true anymore today..today's terrorists come from affluent middle class,educated families who are sufficiently educated themselves and have the necessary sophistication to understand fully well the consequences of their actions.These are the numerically few who are holding the numerically large to ransom through their acts of terror.

The answer to the question as to how to contain terrorism lies within each of us today.We have to decide whether we want to live coherently and solve our problems in a civilised manner,through peaceful and constructive methods or would we choose the path of violence,of terror and destruction to have our grievinces heard when there won't be anybody at all to hear them.

Reflection muses...

Language is the basis for recapturing experience...

- Cyhthia Selfae