An ordinary Indian's woe!!!!

I was just glancing through the Sunday Times Op Ed page and I came across two very different articles... one by Swapan Dasgupta on how the brave, tech savvy, Gen X of Egypt brought down an autocratic 30 year rule, below it was another article by Chetan Bhagat 'An open letter to Soniaji'... this one was about the unbearable corruption that the Indian democracy has given birth to...
Now the two articles are quite a contradiction at the first glance... the Egypt article shows how people faced innumerable difficulties trying to bring in a democratic system into a country ruled under US whims and the other reflects how a mature democracy and the largest one at that falters under it's own weight... though they seem to be contradicting each other, there is indeed a great connection underlining the two...
Imagine the India 64 years ago... newly independent, brimming with hope and giving rise to a popular democracy with noble ideas... the first article would have fit to the T.... now imagine Egypt 64 years later... the revolution having succeeded has now given rise to a vast democratic system, freedom of expression and association are abound.. and a system filled with corruption... the second article would have fitted perfectly.
Well of course it might not be true, Egypt probably wouldn't succumb to the pressures Indian democracy have been subjected to, it could well be prove to be a more mature democracy that deals with corruption and inefficiency with an iron fist, where babus and corporate czars and politicians and powerful journalists are treated alike with the "aam aaadmi" and where newspapers everyday do not have pages filled with reports of scams, scandals, kickbacks and illegal accounts in Switzerland... yes Egypt's democracy could be all that... and I pray to God that their democracy doesn't become a mockery like ours.
Isn't frustrating, we see (as we've been seeing) other countrymen fighting police lathis and camel soldiers, to get democracy and we, after having all the freedom and the democratic set up that others are fighting for, misusing them so blatantly?
Where did we go wrong?
We, Indians, are a comparatively much more literate people, quite intelligent, tech savvy, having a pretty good idea of what constitutes right and wrong, we even have electronic voting mechanisms ( even US relies on ballot paper) that ensures our precious votes aren't tampered with, we have GDP figures that makes many a country blush and a lot more freedom of expression, association etc.... we are also extremely patriotic (bordering on jingoism) when it comes to international events of any kind and when other nations point out our flaws and so and so forth... so why are we so corrupt, why has "our democracy" given birth to such immense levels of corruption, why does everyone in power from government, to the armed forces, to the corporates and even the judiciary steeped in corruption????
A recent study by the Times of India and Synovate Research points out that the levels of corruption have breached our tolerance levels... India mind you has a history of scams, scandals and kickbacks right from the "Nehruvian" era... but suddenly this has become all pervasive. Earlier politicians were synonymous with the "C" word, now suddenly everyone from every field is out in the light having stashed away crores of rupees for personal use.
Well the answer is perhaps not very difficult to find, it is "we" the people who have given rise to a system that helps breed in corruption, no I m not saying all of us directly give or take bribes on every occasion, but it's our nature of getting our work done 'jaise bhi', our attitude of throwing around influential names, our showing off when we get those VIP seats without payment, our inbred idea that a Police in uniform can "always be bought"... these are the very things that breeds in corruption. If we want to save ourselves, leave alone the nation, then we have to bring changes in these minor attitudes of ours otherwise we plainly cannot survive.
We'll become one of those nation which thrives on US backed Aid (we have an example in our neighborhood), yes Chetan Bhagat is quite correct when he says that corruption is worse than terrorism as terrorism can be fought with planned strategies but corruption can only be overcome through individual will and character.
Long live the Egyptian Revolution... only wish Indians would enumerate it!!!!

A Skeptic's Truth

Two years ago in a sudden fit of enthusiasm for voluntary social work, I enrolled myself into this NGO. The inspiration came from the certificate that I received for volunteering for the Times of India's "Teach India Program". This one entailed taking communicative English classes for women inmates at a prominent Kolkata Correctional Home (another sophisticated term for Women's Jail). As I have had some experience at teaching communicative English at College, I jumped at the offer.
The day I reached the NGO, I was informed that I have to undergo training of some sort at how to communicate with the women and I was to be mentored by a senior who worked at a nearby Correctional Home, doing the same job for which I had signed up.
The first day I met my senior-cum-trainer-cum-mentor, I knew she was the classic "textbook feminist case"... these types are found frequenting Indian University campuses, wearing "kurtas" of a dark hue, jeans, specs with heavy frames, carrying jute "jholas", heavy silver jewelry... and never lipstick!!! till date I haven't met a single one who wore a lipstick... oh! and dark "kohl" in their eyes...
This one (my mentor-cum-trainer) had all the trademark qualities. She took one look at me and dismissed me as the "non sustainable ones", probably because I was wearing a shocking pink salwar... along with pink lipstick... (what a blasphemy!!!)... however she was pretty cordial and explained all I was supposed to do. This week I was to accompany her to the Correctional Home she taught in and observe her at work. I was also given the liberty to talk to the women so as to familiarize myself with them. After this ten minute intro she shut up. For the duration of the journey that we undertook in the NGO's White Ambassador, I peppered her with enthusiastic questions none of which were answered in complete, meaningful sentence.
After reaching our preferred destination where my mentor was greeted with reverent smiles, she seem to have quite an effect on the inmates, I thought, she took pain to introduce me to everybody present and by their looks I could sense that they also put me into the "non sustainable category".
Undeterred I ploughed further and approached a group nearby. As soon as I started introducing myself, my mentor's voice was heard instructing the ladies to gather where she had set up her black board. The group I had approached left in a huff. Slightly demoralized I wandered further to find a shade from where I was to "observe" my mentor at work.
That was when I spotted her. She was seated on one of the stone seats beneath the shade of a giant tree, in the inmates' uniform, her head covered with a black 'dupatta', her back turned to me. I was slightly taken aback.

'Hello!' I called out, she didn't turn around.

'Why aren't you in the class?', my next obvious question. No response elicited.

'May I sit next to you?' my third plea.

All this while she had studiously refused to even acknowledge my existence. With timid steps I went and sat next to her.

"Hello!" I again repeated, this time my greeting was accompanied by an outstretched palm, to let her know, that she was recipient of the greeting. Slowly she turned around and I gasped, my mouth fell open, shocked...

The face that looked at me was burnt on the right, there were no eyebrow or eyelashes to speak of, infact no eye at all, just a black unblinking iris, it was gruesome... her left eyebrow and eyelashes also seem to be partially burnt. The right of her nose and lips didn't exist. It was the most macabre human face I have ever set my eyes upon. Infact it didn't even look remotely humane. I don't remember how much time had lapsed. All I do remember are those eyes, a black iris on one side and a partial eye on the other looking unblinking at me. I must have looked abysmally foolish with that open mouthed expression and my palms still stretched out. After sometime, she turned away. I withdrew my hand and stood up. There was nothing to ask, really, my mind was still blank.
As I started walking back, I heard a soft voice- " ai je aapni aar ekhane aashben na, eshob aapnar jonno noy"... (please do not come back here again, this isn't your calling). There was no contempt in that voice, no sarcasm, no regret, no nothing, just a mere stating of a fact. I turned and gingerly walked away.
While on the return journey, I narrated my amazing meeting to my mentor.

"Oh! so then you met Sumati, she doesn't attend the classes", my mentor stated.

"Why, what happened to her face... why is she here? why doesn't she attend your classes?" my volley of questions.

"She's quite educated already; she used to teach English at a primary school".

"Why is she here?"

"For murder. She bound her husband and her in-laws to a chair and set them ablaze".

"Why?" I almost yelled out.

My mentor shrugged, "oh! the usual Indian bride's story, you know, cruel torture, daily beatings, bickering over dowry... the usual sort. She got partially burnt by default".

I never went back to teach communicative English. Sumati was correct. I don't think I have the guts to teach countless Sumatis' adverb, adjectives, prepositions...

Just Another Love Story???

This post is about this movie I saw yesterday... "Arekti Premer Golpo" (Another Love Story)... First of all let me make it very clear that this is the first time I m trying to write a film review of sorts... come to it... its not even a review... this is just how I felt after seeing this particular movie.
To begin with this is the first time acclaimed Bengali director Rituporno Ghosh has tried his hand at acting and he has done a tremendous job of it. The film deals with a very sensitive issue and raises certain uncomfortable questions about our perception of what's "accepted" and what's "normal"... there aren't too many comic timings in the movie, so for those looking for the "fun" element, u can give this film a miss...
I think this is the first time something like this has been tried in Bengali cinema... nay, I would say In Indian Cinema.
The basic story line is very simple... A director and his crew comes from Delhi to make a documentory on a "jatra" artist ("jatra" is a rudimentary theater form of Bengal), Chapal Bhaduri. Now the catch is when Chapal Bhaduri acted on stage, no women were allowed to act, so men used to dress up like women and play their parts. This could also be seen in the 16th century Shakespearean plays where women could not act on stage.
So Chapal Bhaduri, our protagonist, thinks of himself as a woman in a man's body, mind u this Chapal Bhaduri character is real, now our director played by Rituporno Ghosh aka Abhiroop (in the film) likes to term himself as the "third sex" he isn't ashamed of his feminity or his love for his co director played by Indraenil Sengupta aka Basu. Abhiroop is sensitive, cranky, arrogant, and incredibly intelligent. Mind u he's also sensitive towards Basu's needs because Basu is married and is keeping his love for Abhiroop a secret from his wife.
The film progresses showcasing Chapal Bhaduri's life and particularly his intense passion for his lover and simultaneously superimposes it on Abhiroop's life which is quite similar to Bhaduri's except that the later belongs to a past decade when homosexuality was a curse.
The film though tries to showcase the fact the Indian society had tremendously progressed and almost all the characters accept Abhiroop's dalliances with Basu, but the question remains has Indian society progressed far enough, have we really become that broad minded and open in our acceptance?
The music is incredible and the cinematography brilliant. Some of the characters, I felt could have been worked upon such as that of Jishu Sengupta's and Raima Sen's. Jishu plays an important chracter in the movie though his character remains a bit of mystery, Basu's wife is another mysterious character (played exceptionally by Churni Ganguly), which had chances of being portrayed in a different light. The conclusion is somewhat predictable and cliched.
It is an intense film and the purpose of the makers isn't merely entertainment. They have a very serious message that they are trying to send out... but as I pondered earlier have we become flexible enough to accept that message?
I would like to advise a thing or two to the "would be viewers" if u want to watch the movie, please leave your inhibitions behind. There are certain scenes that could make u queasy or make u squirm in ur seat. But if u want to watch a movie for the movie's sake, please do so. It's a beautifully crafted film and forces u to stop and think for a while. If u miss this movie you could be missing something really exceptional.

The Silent Scream...

The Silent Scream....

The wall on which the prophets wrote,
Is cracking at the seams,
Upon the instruments of death,
The sunlight brightly gleams.
When every man is torn apart...
With nightmares and dreams,
Will no one lay the laurel wreath,
When silence drowns the scream...


Marriage...

He was staring at me, lecherous and creepy...
His beady eyes,
fixed upon my thights
Not for me, I thought,
Not for me, this sort.
I found I was wrong,
My bridegroom to be
Arranged by my loved ones
The "done thing", you see;
My life decided, my future mapped out
The hidden stars,
In the constellation above,
What about love, I asked in distress,
Fearful and broken
Rooted in stress.
The answer was brisk
It will come with time
And money rules, dear girl
And so we've obliged.
The haggling for the dowry
Continued well into the night
With my loved ones enumerating
My many good points
I could cook well,
Sew well,
Wash and clean
Other wifely duties
Would come with
The change in scene
So I was sold
So I was bought
Money exchanged hands,
I was truly caught...

Kusum Lata Sawhney

2010..people who mattered...

Well as the title might suggest, I should warn all the readers right in the beginning, it's isn't a current affairs post.. no, I won't be talking about the numerous scams our country faced... the dirty games our politicians, media personals or the rich guys played... or for that matter how everyone and anyone who stepped in to this country became corrupt... and how helpless our democracy is becoming!!! there are too many posts on them already!!!
Before beginning a disclaimer.. I have mentioned quite a few people here I met and loved in 2010, but I have left out Sagnik Sanyal ie Rony, my brother... who is, was and will always be extremely special to me... since he has had the numero uno position in my list of attention since 1988.. I didn't think of separately mentioning him... but not to hurt his sentiments, he remains my favourite person of all times!!!! :)
So this is a post about "ME".. well basically as a lot of people know.. I m probably my favorite topic... so this is an article written about how my 2010 went.
Well in the first place I needn't have written this particular post... but nowadays as a lot of people have started taking an interest in my blog...( to my utter surprise).. and i have even acquired two followers!!!... surprise.. surprise!!! I felt imperative to write something... so here it goes...
Well first I met some amazing people this year.. notable among them Aanand, Shibram, Niloy.. they went on to become, in the course of the year... amazing friends...!!! A word or two about each...
Aanand, I met at a music concert... and the first thing that attracted me to him was his red "kurta" and the second, his utter indifference to the cacophony around him.. he was one of the few who were actually concentrating on the music being played in front of them!!! I love people like him!!!... in the later part of the year as I got to know him better, I learnt that there were many many things common between us... our liking of history, our shared interest in reading, our disdain of Internet books, our interest in world's mysterious places...etc etc... he's got this aura of simplicity and honesty...and a quiet, calm demeanor unlike me, an amazing sense of humour and he's a looker!!! :) it was really special knowing him...
Shibram... I must confess that this guy's a brain... he was one of the toppers in the IES exam.. but besides that he's a wonderful wonderful friend.. and a wonderful person... though we did fight in the middle of the year...but we did make up... and it was a wonderful experience knowing him...especially the last day we spent togather...it'll always be special to me!!!
Niloy... he's actually my friend's friend... but I must confess.. I talk to him more than I do with that friend of mine!!!! this guy is a store house of talent... he's a dancer, a photographer and an artist all rolled into one...though I have had only one chance of meeting him.. I did come to know a lot of silly stuff about him.. like his fear of horror movies!!! his love for Christmas Carols!!!! his interest in visiting Victoria Memorial and the Indian Museum... all of which I loved!!! it's been amazing knowing him...I hope we remain buddies in 2011 too!!!!
Another person this year I somewhat become a lot more closer to was Gabbu ie Sayan my cousin... though we had been close in the past but this year we actually graduated to being amazing friends!!! maybe his "break up" had something to do with this but I cherish it nonetheless.. not the break up.. but our renewed closeness... Gabbu is not just "my cousin" anymore but a very close, indispensable friend!!!!
Another person who I must mention...I became a lot more closer to was Anupa... at the outset I must tell u.. she's my oldest friend in Kolkata, no, not in terms of age, she's quite young and beautiful...(probably one of the most beautiful girls I have known!!!) but in terms of our association...we go back to Calcutta Girls days... well we were always close but 2010 somehow saw the re kindling of that friendship... it was beautiful thing... also I should thank her for the numerous passes of musical concerts that she supplied... the advices she keeps giving me regarding my choice of guys!!!! and also the wonderful and eventful Durga Pujo at her place...!!!
While I m on the subject of people who mattered to me in 2010.. I have to mention the two Sourav's... one Upadhay and the other Chatterjee... come to it they both share the same first name...!!!.. ok Sourav Upadhay I knew him from probably 2009.. but we really came to know each other and actually become close buddies this year... it was wonderful wonderful knowing the guy.. who I believe someday will rise up to be a brilliant bureaucrat or a brilliant politician. Coming to Saurav Chatterjee... he's my cousin's class mate.. and to be honest I haven't met him personally yet... but we became amazingly close internet friends... actually we share many common interests and to be honest I thought we were "soul mates" there can't be any other word to describe our friendship!!! :)
Oh before I forget.. I have to mention Maria.. I came to know her this year..like properly..and trust me it was an amazing discovery of a person who has to an extent become my idol... She's a Spanish Languages Professor of Calcutta University and she has really lived life on her own terms... she's traveled to as many as 5 countries in different continents!!! and she has this amazing collection of earrings... yes she's my personal favorite of 2010!!!! we concurred on numerous topics...though she's leaving the next year.. i do hope our friendship continues beyond our Cal days!!!!
Another person without whom this write up would not be complete is Sayak Boral... he has been an amazing friend, counselor, guide, philosopher...and what not!!!! though I have known him for a long time... this year saw renewed friendship between the two of us... so much so that I was inspired to write a fictional story on it.. I made my protagonist a lot like him!!!! Sayak thanks for being my pillar of strength when I needed a friend!!!! :)
Not to forget my evergreen friends who made even this year a memorable one... Pushpal... my all weather friend...we fight, we make up, then we fight some more and again make up...!!!! Some of my best memories this year are with him... Ananyadi's marriage, the last day of the Pujo....what not!!! oh i also tried hooking him up with this friend of mine...but that's a different story... Neelanjana... my best freind out here... as usual the gal's been there for me!!!!! love u for that... :)
Now coming to myself.. I learnt quite a few things about ME!!!! like I hate guys who are deeply into "Branded stuff"... I mean it's good to have info on national and international branded stuffs.. and use them, wear them, eat them and the like.. but to be a fan of them and to be devoted to them is something I can't stand!!!.. and of course I hate the guys who do not take an interest in outdoor sports!!! and also those guys who watch Zoom channel on television when they are alone!!!! I mean guys be MEN... plz!!!
Ok perhaps the most important lesson of 2010... for me was : Do not go into a relationship that lacks physical chemistry... seriously I mean it guys.. you'll start hating yourself!!!
I took up violin...oh god now I love myself even more... now I can add another qualification to my illustrious CV ( no pun intended)!!!
Also I actually started writing short stories... I didn't think I could... I thought I could only write boring nonrhythmic poetry.... which I must tell you my brother hates!!! of course Times Of India didn't think they were worthy enough to be printed.. but my friends liked it and u can actually see some of the praises they have showered upon the stories on my blog!!!! :)....
This year like the ones before it saw me not living upto my resolutions!!!!.. well i believe i hadn't made any.. but even if I had i don't remember them now!!!!
Guys the year's ending.. I m sure u must have had a much more fruitful year than the one I had.. but nevertheless.. I cherish this year.. for the people I met and the relationships I renewed. They, for most part made 2010 memorable for me!!!! Thank u dear readers for reading through this monologue!!! love u all and may u have a wonderful, fruitful 2011!!! God Bless u!! :)

10 things I like best... :)

I have decided to make a list of the top 10 things I like the best... in every way...

1. Talking endlessly to people I really really like.
2. Talking to Ronnie...(my bro and my best friend)
3. My Mom's cooking
4. Snuggling up in bed on a rainy night with a Mill's and Boon's
5. Going on a long drive with Bollywood romantic numbers on... if I m not driving....the co passenger or the Driver doesn't matter much...of course it would be better if I have that special person there... ;) ...my dad or my bro would also work nice...
6. Dressing up for somewhere nice...occasion or place doesn't matter much...the dressing up does... also....shopping for cosmetics and packaged food stuff at the nearby shopping Mall
7. Posing for photos... again occasions don't matter much..even other people in the photo don't...
8. A movie with my family....or a holiday... or an outing... anywhere with my mom and dad...and Ronnie...my brother
9. Visit to the beauty salon every month....I feel so special after all the pampering..
10. Dinner with my parents and my Brother... every night...when I m away from home...it's the thing I miss the most...

The Unending Journey

It was past midnight when the train screeched to a halt at some unknown station. Shruti woke up. Surprisingly the compartment was empty. She blinked to get her vision accustomed to the darkness and peered outside the window. She could not see anything, just lines of dark rail tracks and a small station at the far end, a faint light emitting from some kind of a building. It was eerily dark. Shruti shrugged off the unfamiliar pang of fear, she was not someone who was scared easy.
"I need to stretch my legs a bit", she got up and walked up and down the passage. It was difficult to make out anything in the dark. She vowed to never again avail the Railway Concession given by her college as it stipulated journey only by the Sleeper Class, A/C would have been more comfortable. She came back to her seat. 'God the train is late again', she inwardly cursed the Indian Railways for their errant timings. She tried switching on the lights, 'goddamn railways', she cursed out aloud, 'even the electricity's gone'. She settled herself beneathe the blanket, 'ah, it would probably be a long wait' ; she thought to herself and closed her eyes, willing herself to sleep.

Far end at the station, two men sat talking in the Guard's Office.

"Remember the accident five years ago?" said one.

"How could I forget, I was the goddamn linesman", cursed the other.

"Nobody survived, did they?"

"No, none, I wonder though, why they have left the remaining bogies on the track. If they were removed, the track could be used again couldn't it?"

They looked out and saw the skeleton of a train, badly burnt and dilapidated, standing on the track, motionless, forlorn, haunting...

Inside the train's compartment Shruti blissfully drifted off to sleep.