Showing posts with label India. Show all posts
Showing posts with label India. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

What Mandela's struggle meant to me...

Nine months ago, I was a stranger to this land, and as a stranger does so often, I only knew Nelson Mandela as a great leader and as a great Gandhian who fought against an unjust system and won after a long, hard struggle... How long or how hard the struggle was, eluded me... now nine months living in South Africa and having studied the history of the land, having talked to many of the people who inhabit this land and after visits to certain historical landmarks, I can safely say, that Nelson Mandela was not only a leader of South Africa but of all the people who seem to have lost hope.

Last Thursday night when he breathed his last, South Africa not only lost it's father, but the world lost a great humanist. It's only fitting that his Memorial Service is being held today, the 10th of December, which also happens to be the International Human Rights Day... Nothing could have fitted the occasion more than  the ode being paid to this great leader.

Since the passing away of Madiba (as he was affectionately called here) the South African weather also seem to be mournful. The cheerful and sunny weather has given way to a rainy, gloomy and cloudy weather, though according to the local lore, it is a good sign. It means that God is now ready to accept a great soul into his kingdom and the rains are his symbol for the said event.

Last Friday, when most South Africans woke up to the historic news of Madiba's passing away, I and my husband Rahul went to have coffee at a nearby coffee house... all around me were the images of the great man and news were flying thick and fast about the days to come... Beside us, there were these two white gentlemen who were equally absorbed in the news when it suddenly occurred to me that if it was not for Nelson Mandela, I and Rahul would have never been able to sit so freely beside those two white men... we would have our separate enclosure and maybe we would have been sitting outside in the rain...

What Mandela taught us most importantly is that before any other considerations, we are all human beings, not a whole lot of Indians of my generation will understand it but if I told you that even nineteen years ago, I would be put be put in Jail for writing this blogpost, just because of my color, you would understand, what I mean, when I say, Nelson Mandela fought not only for South Africa, but also for you and me...and for the hope we all have...


Thursday, October 3, 2013

Understanding Hinduism: Part 1: The Emergence...

For a long time, about a month approximately, I have been pondering on whether to write upon Hinduism and it's discourses as I understand it... There were too many hazards to writing this post and if I were to write on it, I would have to jack up my courage...

Firstly, it is a subject that could at once make a pariah out of me... secondly, there have been far greater, far more learned, far more educated and informed people who have propounded upon the subject...  Thirdly, my own belief in God is rather agnostic... that is I believe, that there is a God , I mean a super conscious entity, a cosmic power that definitely exceeds my humble limits of imagination, but I do not believe that whatever that power is, possesses a 'religion', at least, not in the sense that we, now know of it... Therefore I do not believe in any religion... but at the same time, I am a practicing Hindu...  oxymoronic, right? These were exactly the reasons I was so far delaying and pondering upon whether to write this post or not...

 So why did I set out to write this post?

The answer is basically because I believe in Hinduism, not as a religion, but as a way of life.

So what is it that has helped Hinduism survive throughout the ages... the faith has seen the advent of many world religions such as Jainism and Buddhism, Christianity and lastly Islam. Why is Hinduism still the world's third largest religion and why does it still have a billion followers?

I set out to find answers to these questions. I began to study the history of the religion and to study the history of the religion is to study the history of the land where this belief system emerged... Hinduism as a religion or a philosophy, (I like to call it a philosophy), is innately connected with the social and political history of the land, we now called India. Hinduism is one of the world's oldest surviving religions... many other faiths and beliefs which were contemporary to this faith have entirely disappeared.

What is Hinduism ? Emergence

The first proto Hinduism was probably practiced by the natives of the Indus Valley civilization which emerged on the banks of the river Indus from the period 3300-1300 BC... The other civilizations contemporary to the Indus Valley Civilization, were the Nile Valley Civilization and the Mesopotamian Civilization, the beliefs of the people of the two later civilizations having disappeared with the collapse and decline of the civilizations themselves. The religious practices and beliefs of the Harappan people, however endured and after the decline of the Indus Valley civilization were merged in the oncoming Aryan beliefs and re-emerged as the Vedic religion.

It should be noted at this point that the word denoting, the religion, as we know of today, "Hinduism" is essentially a 13th century invention... The Persians or the Arab merchants who had trade relations with India, could not pronounce the alphabet "S" , therefore they called the river "Sindhu" (modern day Indus) "Hindu" and the land beyond this river, Hind... The term 'Hinduism' was later used occasionally in some Sanskrit texts such as the later 'Rajtaranginis' (lore of the kings) of Kashmir. It was only towards the end of 18th century that European merchants and colonists began to refer to the general beliefs of the people living in this land as Hinduism.

It is thus of utmost importance to note, that the religion is named after a mighty river and like a river, has ingrained in itself a plethora of belief, faiths, and cultures.

Thus, our first understanding of Hinduism starts at the understanding of the history of India.

The Harappan Civilization: Proto Hinduism :

The Harappan or the Indus Valley Civilization emerged on the banks of the Indus river basin and was one of the earliest urban civilization to have emerged during the time. The other civilizations which arose approximately around this time frame were the Mesopotamian civilization and the Nile Valley or the Egyptian civilization.

The inhabitants of the Indus Valley civilization, (it is also called the Harappan civilization because one of the largest and the earliest towns to be excavated was called 'Harappa') largely worshiped animals and plants and believed in amulets. The Harappan seals carry many of the animals such as buffaloes and bulls, stamped on them. There is much debate on a symbol on a seal which has been excavated, depicting a three headed God, surrounded by animals, who according to the historian John Marshall depicts a form of proto 'Shiva' or 'Pashupati' (lord of animals). The historian Romila Thapar contends, that Shiva, as a Hindu God emerged only in the later Vedic age some 2000 years later and hence the description of this symbol as proto Shiva or 'Pashupati' is wholly misleading. It might be that there was some kind of 'shaman' or medical man that existed during that time who had the unique characteristic of domesticating animals. Maybe that, the later god Shiva or Pashupati has been designed on this Harappan deity.

Harappans also believed in a number of symbols such as Swastika drawn on their seals. The Swastika symbol has been much maligned because of its heinous and wrongful use as the symbol of Adolf Hitler's Nazi Party, but the symbol has roots deep in human civilization. The word 'Swastika' comes from the Sanskrit word 'Shuvastika'  'shuva' meaning good, 'astika' meaning mark, "Shuvastika" meaning "the mark of the good", and represents the peaceful alignment of the four elements of nature, the air, the wind, the earth and the water with the four phrases of Human life, the childhood, the adolescence, the mature age and the old age... It is indeed sad, how a symbol so pure in it's origin was so maligned in it's use.

However, the earliest forms of Swastika's can be found on the Harappan seals.

There does not exist any temple or structures of spiritual endevour among the Harappan people but the early use of fire as a religious symbol has been found in some of the cities that belonged to the Late Harappan phrase.

The language of the Indus Valley, unfortunately still remains a mystery, whatever conclusions have been made regarding the civilization has been based on archaeological finds. If we were to know the language of the Harappan people, more light could have been shed on their religious and spiritual beliefs.

Thus, it is noteworthy that, the first basis of Hinduism lay in naturalistic and animalistic forces. We shall see in the second part, how it developed from a mere scattered belief system into a system of texts and how it began to usher in a more rigid form.

The coming of the Aryans did much to contextualize the religion as well to give it a firmer shape and direction.

Image Courtsey:

http:/en.wikipedia.org
http;/indianetzone.com
http:/commons.wikimedia.org
http:/counter-currents.com
http:/muktinath.org

References:

Romlia Thapar : Ancient India

Mazumdar,Raychaudhari & Datta : An Advanced History of India

Krishna Reddy: TataMcGraw Hill Publications: Indian History

Indus Civilization: IGNOU Booklet 2

www.wikipedia.com




Friday, September 27, 2013

My Life as a "wanderlust" : Sophie and Me... The unique relationship between me and my South African domestic...

Sophie is my domestic helper... no, I think that definition is a very narrow one...

Sophie, for me, is a doorway to know the culture of the land, I now inhabit... she is my mirror to the larger society that I am a part of, and yet I am quite aloof from it all... being an expat from the United States and an Indian national, we largely have American and Indian friends, who are all expatriates. We stay in gated communities, quite away from the humdrum, the joviality and the color of an ordinary South African life. We are fortunate enough to have a car at our disposal, wherever we wish to go... I have no idea how the "bucckies" (taxis, here in South Africa) are and I am quite unfortunately unaware of the problems that are faced by ordinary South Africans, in their ways of life... because as I said before, I live in a shell like existence...

That is the prime reason, why Sophie is important to me...

Not only she helps me keep my house clean, she also serves as a window to the larger, ordinary South African life...

Will Julius Malema make it to the elections next year..??? Is Robert Mugabe really as bad as portrayed in the world media?  How were the days for her, as a "black domestic" working in a predominantly "white neighborhood" in the days of apartheid? Do the tribes here, really keep Cheetahs as pets and how does one conform to the dual identity of being a Christian and a proud Tribal landlord...

These are some of the questions that Sophie unknowingly answers in our everyday conversations...

The first day, she came to work in my house, the second thing she said, after a big smile and a "thank you" ; is that she has never worked for "this color before", touching my arm to show that she has never worked with an Indian native before... Honestly, I was surprised and to tell the least I was shocked... I had never given any thought to my skin color before, at least not in the sense that Sophie implied, and then I realized that the skin color issue goes so deep in their psyche, that she just can't help but point it out...

I justified my skin color and the country of my origin by stating the one name, I thought she might be familiar with, Mahatma Gandhi... I asked her, "do you know of Mahatma Gandhi? He lived here in South Africa. I am from his country... same color, and same country, you see"... she responded with a huge smile, "yes Gandhi, I know Gandhi", "good man, very good man".... he fought for us...." I really wished some of our Indian Leaders could hear it... especially now, when the only day we remember the great man, is on his birth anniversary, and that too because it's a public holiday.

It's now been almost five months since I have known Sophie, and it seems to me, that she, through her stories, open up an incredible world  for me... it's a world inhabited by proud African chieftains, of the glorious wars the kings fought for cattle, the days of oppression, of Apartheid, of an entire nation suppressed by a minority government and of 1994, when Sophie who was 38 years of age and her mother 80 years old, went to vote for the first time in their lives...

Sophie belongs to the Ndebele (pronounced "debele", the N is silent) tribe who live mostly in the province of Mpumalanga (the M is silent)... her family is related to a tribal warlord who at one time had accumulated millions of cattle and were trading partners with the Boer settlers when they first came in... her mother still lives in a small village in a wattle and daub house and her only brother, was shot by the Apartheid Police when he was 22 and was working as an electrician for a white businessman, his crime, he was out in the "white neighborhood"  without his "identity pass" at 7 pm in the evening... he was the only bread earner in the family of four... after which Sophie took on the responsibility of the household and set off to eMahlaleni (Witbank), an industrial town some seven kilometers away from her village to find work as a domestic...

She has one daughter, Precious, who studies Chemical Engineering in Stellenbosch University near Cape Town. When Precious was small, she could not get admitted to a school near Sophie's then employer's home, because it was reserved for "white kids only" , her then employer, a White doctor called Jaco, (who still live in Silver Lakes, one of the biggest gated Estates in Pretoria East) introduced Precious as their own adopted daughter in order to secure admission for her in a school a short distance away where his children also studied. He and his wife, used to take Precious with their own girls to the school in their car... something that was unthinkable in the Apartheid ridden South Africa...

When she speaks of Nelson Mandela, her eyes fill with tears... Mandela, also known as 'Madiba' here, is the father of the nation. What Mandela and the African National Congress did for the majority of Black South Africans can be gauged from Sophie's life. Sophie belongs to the lowermost strata of the society, a strata long oppressed first by the white minority and then by the elite black minority. Sophie's daughter who is hopefully going to enter the growing middle class is her only hope of having a better life, one in which she hopes, to no longer work as a domestic helper.

As I grow more familiar with her, her life seems so richly filled with experiences, that my own struggles seem puny. She looks much more than 57 years of age, a face wrinkled and creased by experiences, age and struggles. As a woman, Sophie has had to struggle on many levels, a single mother trying to eke a living for herself and her daughter, a black domestic worker, working for white employers, a dutiful daughter whom circumstances forced to become the sole breadwinner for the family, a devoted Christian, and an ANC Card holding member, who with millions of her countrymen are engaged in a long battle to elevate and gain an equal standing in the land of their birth.

The one thing that never ceases to amaze me about Sophie, is this woman, whom life has handed out probably the harshest of the terms, never ever blames life for her destiny. She always has a smile on her face when I open the door in the mornings that she comes to my house. She is always grateful to god, that he has given her a life and enough to eat to maintain her strength so that she can work and earn her livelihood...

Nowadays, very often, a small quote by Gandhi (yes, again, back to him)... comes to my mind, it goes something like this, "when you are in a difficulty, when your ability to decide is being challenged and you are confused about the path to take, think about the most poorest and the most courageous man or woman you have ever met, and think, how the path(s) you are about to take, will effect him or her. You'll see it becomes easy and something that seem complicated, resolves smoothly".

Before this I could not think of any one till I met Sophie...

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

In Defense of "The Indian Gentleman"

I am an Indian woman, liberal, educated and very much vocal about women's rights.

I am also the daughter of, a sister to, and the wife of, extremely decent, responsible and caring Indian men and I have many male friends whom I am proud to call  "friend".

I am also a woman who deeply cares and is very aware about the pathetic condition in which Indian women are treated and the endless harassments they face at home, at work and generally everywhere, almost at each step in their lives.

I am writing this post because, there recently has been another incident of Rape in India and this time in the financial capital of Mumbai and it has shaken the entire country once more. There has been much said in the popular as well as the social media about the attitude and the mindset of Indian men and about how, we should, as a society try and change it.

It is true that Indian men, a large enough portion of them have rather medieval attitude towards women, in fact almost all our social laws, tradition and customs have been designed in such a way so as to keep our women languishing at the bottom of the social hierarchy.

Have you noticed how women are scrutinized before marriage, even now, when most of the women are independent and earning (sometimes even more or equal as their male counterparts) and how much emphasis does being "fair", "slender", "convent educated" etc play in arranged marriages ? The matrimonial adverts are teeming with these words and it's disgusting.

But the greater question is:  Are only "Indian Men" responsible for such attitudes?

A society as a whole always reflect the attitudes and perceptions of the people who "make up" the society and this includes both men and women.

I would go as far to say that our Indian women are equal or more than responsible for how the Indian society treats its women. In fact, the other day, I was talking to my brother and he remarked that he's really tired of being generalized as the common Indian "man" who leches and assaults and rapes women, as if all men in India are such. The way our popular and social media goes about asking to change Indian men's perception is really disgusting and moreover it is utterly false. True, we have some of the most harshest and unequal traditions and customs in place to keep Indian women down and out... but are solely Indian men responsible for that ?

Whenever a woman is mistreated, raped or harassed, the first claim of innocence from the accused comes from the mother... has anyone noticed that ? Even in the Mumbai rape case, the mother of the accused has stood up for the accused and has claimed that "her son", the rapist, is actually "an extremely innocent boy and is also underage"... whenever there are domestic violent acts perpetrated, there is always a "mother-in-law", a "sister-in-law" or at least an "aunt" involved.... recently a petty Bollywood actor was accused of raping his domestic, and the first claim of innocence came from the actor's wife, who went as far as saying that the charges were fabricated, when there had already been medical proof to the contrary.

Attitudes such as this, strengthens and emboldens the attitude of the society as a whole and then, when the society perpetrates that perception, we call it wrong, disgusting and unjustified.

Most of the soaps in Indian mainstream television focus on either a housewife getting ill treated at her in-laws hands, or a daughter who is striving very hard to uplift her family from distress, facing embarrassments and overcoming them or an "all sacrificing" daughter-in-law who despite being treated harshly, repents, forgives and gets harshly treated again by her in-laws. Some of these soaps even focus on how a "dark", or "fat", or an otherwise "not so beautiful girl" not getting suitable suitors for marriage. And in ALL OF THEM, the main negative protagonist is also A WOMAN....

And what's worse, there are millions of women, housewives or otherwise, watching these soaps who get influenced by these moronic ideas.

I have grown up in a family where I have three brothers, and all of them are as decent as men could possibly be. My brother, who is also my best friend, is one of the most decent ,man I have till date seen in my life. In fact Indian men are rather, far better, if you compare them to men from other communities and classes such as Blacks or Hispanics. They are far more protective and caring of their family and far less prone to abandoning their duties and responsibilities. I have had several uncles, who has never, in anyway tried to impede on my dignity and I have worked with some of the best male colleagues that one could ever get and my Boss, who incidentally was a man was one of the best bosses ever... I have had male friends who have been extremely decent, not only towards me but also to all the girls/ladies in their life. I have married an extremely decent and an admirable Indian man, who has never once pressured me to do anything, that I haven't wanted to do. I have known some of my girl friend's husbands and they too have been really decent.

Contrary to this, I have also known many a groping men in public buses and strangers, of course, male, on the roads who eyes first travel from my chest area upto my face and then downwards again.

I have also known mother-in-laws who talk about their daughter-in-laws with contempt and ridicule and I have known mothers who have been beset with woes because of their daughter's failure to find a suitable match. I have known " family aunts" and "neighborhood aunties", whose interest in someone's daughter's marriage exceeds her own parent's enthusiasm... I have known female colleagues bitching about other female colleagues and I have also known a female Boss giving less than deserving appraisals to her female juniors.

So my dear readers, there are millions of decent, nice, caring and respectful men in India. These men are considerate, they respect your identity as a woman, and they are freethinking enough to respect your liberty.

As opposed to a hundred lecherous, morally degenerated, abusive, Indian men, there are also several hundreds, nice, decent and caring Indian men and as opposed to many thousands oppressed, ill treated, and abused Indian women, there are also several hundred oppressive, abusive and rather cruel Indian women...

It is a rather sad truth, but it is a truth.

Till the day, we women do not support our own, till the day, we do not do not look into a man's or a woman's eyes if they are treading on our women's rights, we should not blame the Indian male solely for the atrocities permeated on the Indian women. Till the day, women will keep shielding their male relatives for their ill treatment to other women, and till the day we do not impart the same teachings to our daughters and sons regarding women rights and dignities, blaming Indian men and their attitudes, would not help Indian women better their position in the society in any way.

It's best to remember the very famous words, "if men are the heads, women are the necks, whichever way the neck turns, the head too has to turn in the same way"...  So let's be responsible "necks",
my dear women, let's turn the "heads" the right way...

Image Courtesy: www.someecards.com


Friday, July 19, 2013

My Life as a Wanderlust... Atheism, Racism, Gandhi and a Writer's Block...!!

I have been suffering from an overload of ideas... ok I do know the reason for this though... I have been reading and commenting on too many blogs, too many people are giving me ideas and the true Gemini girl that I am all these ideas are inter playing in my little grey cells... I really do not know which ones to concentrate upon and which ones to leave out.

Probably this in itself is a kind of Writer's Block. I know the Wikipedia definition of a Writer's Block and that definition mostly blames anxiety and chaos as the top reasons for having writer's block... but what if the writer has too many ideas clogging her grey cells ?

What then ?

Anxiety or Chaos...?

Take for instance, the other day, I came across a webpage on Atheism, and there was this post, a young boy of sixteen had written... the post noted, how, he was an Atheist and how his mother and sister found this particular trait of his to be an oddity and as such a shameful behavior. That post set me thinking... Of course I did my best to console the child and told him that it's best not to discuss ideas that others find appalling, even if, as a human being, you are entitled to have your own ideas... to get his thoughts on paper, to write them down... that had always helped me, and even today, when I am faced with a terrible, situation which is confounding me, like this one, I find it best to put them in words...

But the post set me thinking... Am I an Atheist ? Does everyone of us have an Atheist in themselves or are we so devoted to our faith that we cannot even grasp the idea of a Godless world ? And then it came to me...

Probably each of us carry an Atheist and a Believer in us, yes the same two contradicting forces find themselves manifested in the same person. Human beings have developed too much, intellectually and socially, to blindly follow any notion that's forced into them. If we were all devoted, blind, believers of our respective faiths, then science would not have made the advancement that it has made since the invention of fire.

And if we were so strictly Atheist, religion would not have been an integral part of our lives, hell, sometimes it even rules us... So the incredible truth is Human beings are both believers and atheists at the same time. We are a clever specie... of course the way we have "evolved" is a testament to the fact, we use faith when it suits us and reason, when it does so.

So think about it, are you strictly an atheist or strictly a believer ?

 In my case I think I am agnostic... I believe in God, but my "god" is made up of all the good deeds and principles, mainly, which I sometimes strive to follow, and sometimes I fail to... Truth, Generosity, Trust, Help, Belief and my parents, these are my GOD... and I do not, never have believed, that there is some big great man or woman sitting up in heaven beyond the skies who's looking after us...

But anyhow, this post was about my Writer's Block, not about Atheism...

The second idea that entered my head and troubled my grey cells was one of Racism... actually while growing up in India, I never bothered about this particular ideology until I came to South Africa... I mean this concept actually blew off my mind, when I came here...

In India, we generally never talk about Race... we talk about Poverty, GDP, Corruption, Education, Rape... (oh my god that IS a big topic), Women's Liberation, and many  more, but never about racial inequalities...

That is a topic, that the western media makes a big hue and cry about... but when I came to South Africa... it was the first time, I was confronted with this notion and how this very vague idea is slowly transforming into a living, breathing reality for me.

My first interaction with this topic came from my domestic. She is a really nice lady, might I say, a black lady... it is important that I point this out, because, the first day when she and I were indulging in our first introductions, she touched my hand and said to me " I have never worked for this people "... her exact words... first, honestly I didn't understand, and then it came to me, actually it thundered onto me, SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT THE COLOR OF MY SKIN.... wow... it was the first time, in my 30 years of life that someone has actually commented on my SKIN COLOR...in a way that made me really THINK about it... Actually I should have taken offense, but after saying this, she was smiling at me, and I couldn't help but reply, " This color is of Gandhi, you know Gandhi "... and she nodded her head in enthusiasm...  "Oh a great man, great man, he did a lot for us..."

The most odd thing about this entire conversation was, when she pointed me my color, the first person that came to my mind was the one that my countrymen have generally forgotten, and when I did mention Gandhi, she said, he was indeed a great, great man... my domestic, might I say, is an extremely poor South African Lady....and she knew that Gandhi had done great things for her country...something Indian young men and women have comfortably chosen to forget...

Anyhow, so these issue are there in my mind and I do not know which one to concentrate upon, Atheism, Racism, India's relationship to Gandhi and his ideals, (well which most Indians think are dead now)... and therefore I am suffering from a Writer's Block...

Or am I ??

I really need to find out...


Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Taking the control in your hands, a necessary read for all types of women...

I have been thinking about whether to upload this post or not for some time, and then I thought maybe someone in my position would probably find it useful.

Ok, first of all, this post isn't at all for kids, so if you, my dear reader, is not above 18 please do not read further, ( of course, if you are below 18 and sexually active, then please ignore the former sentence and do read on). Second of all, this post isn't for those who blindly and devotedly believe in religion, whatever faith that might be, if you are a blind follower and believe in your respective religion or faith keeping aside common sense, this post isn't for you. So now that I have given out my mandatory warnings, let me begin...

I am writing this post primarily for women, for women like me... wherever you are and whatever you do, I hope if you were ever or would be in my position in the foreseeable future, you would find this post helpful.

I am 30 years old, married (very happy too..!!!) and have just completed a year and two months of marital bliss. As like many other couple who take steps to ensure that extension of the family is well planned, we too have taken some such measures and we follow them scrupulously... not that we don't like children, or we don't want to have them... we love kids, and we would love a family of our own... but not now, not unless we are ready for them... so anyway, one fine night our method of contraception didn't work out as it should have and I faced the terrible consequence of being pregnant with a child. The morning after the beautiful night, both me and my husband realized the gravity of the situation and we started discussing, whether or not to take the "morning-after pill"... now let me tell you straight away, I scoured the internet and numerous blogs, for more information on emergency contraceptive pills, and though I found a lot of information, I did not get a single article or post of a woman, who might have taken the pill herself. No real life account of real women who have taken the pill. That is one of my most important reason of writing this post so that, if someone is in my position, they can come across this blog post and learn about a real life incident, because this is what happened to me.

Also, please allow me to state here, in my defense, that I am an average healthy woman (touchwood...!!) and I really do not believe in medication of any kind... I was extremely reluctant to take the pill, educated and learned as we were, there were some lingering doubts. Also, although we are followers of the Hindu faith, our religion does not say anything about this... or probably we are not aware of it... anyhow, we really went over every single internet article we could find on the Emergency Contraceptive Pill and its after effects. When we were somewhat sure, that the pill is not life-threatening, I decided to take it.

I took the Plan B One Step, an Emergency Contraceptive, that can be obtained over the counter in most drug stores in USA, I really don't have much idea, which Emergency Contraceptive Pills are available in other countries, but I am sure, some kind of pill is definitely available.

I was also extremely doubtful of it's working and wasn't even sure that it'll work... but work it did, and I am extremely glad to say that I did take it and also at the right time.

I know a lot of women, conceive when they are not ready, or not mentally prepared. Ladies, it's fine, it's not something wrong not to be prepared for a child. And even if it does happen, you still can control it... I am giving below some sites that I had searched when deciding whether or not to take this particular medicine.

http://ec.princeton.edu/info/ecp.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_contraception

http://www.safersex.co.za/family-planning-Emergency-Contraceptives.htm

http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/emergency-contraception-morning-after-pill-4363.asp

These are the sites I visited before I took the "morning-after pill"... it is essentially a very safe medicine. I did not experience any side effects... of course I drank a lot of water for about a week daily after taking the medication and these are not "abortion pills"... If you have the pills, within 72 hours of unprotected physical intimacy, they work absolutely fine. I took them within 48 hours, of course, all the sites I visited said the earlier you take it the better.

So please, if any of you are in my situation and are confused and you don't know what to do and you are not ready to bring a child into this world, think about this pill... it's supposed to be absolutely safe and does not harm you or your reproductive ability. If you have already conceived, then the pill does not hurt the unborn foetus.

There are a huge number of unintended or mistimed pregnancies happening all over the world. According to Wikipedia, about 38 percent of all pregnancies in the world are unintended or mistimed. This also results in a large number of maternal deaths and infant deaths. Also the health of the mother and the child could be gravely affected.

Bringing a child into this world is a huge responsibility, and a lot of educated women like me know this. We all want to give the best of everything to our child, and we should also. Therefore it's even more important to bring a child into this world, when and if you are ready for it. To me, personally, motherhood is the greatest gift nature has endowed on women, and therefore it's a huge and life changing decision for me and I can say, that I am not ready as of yet. All I can say, that if you are not ready to bring a child in this world, take precautions to prevent it. Again, let me stress, that I do not advocate abortion in any case and thus knowing about the options available makes us powerful.

Also, as this issue is quite sensitive, a lot of you may not be comfortable talking about it to your parents or even friends, I know, for one, I would not have been able to talk about this to my parents... I actually haven't. I don't think these measures were available during their time, and even if they were available, probably it was a sin to even put them into practice.

But times have changed now, now we can really take control of our lives, the way we want to, and that's why I wrote this post. I really hope that this post helps someone who's in need, because trust me, having a real life account helps tremendously... I didn't have it, I hope you do...please if you come across this, do share it because it is only information that makes us powerful.


Tuesday, March 5, 2013

My life as a "wanderlust" ... The Story of Sarada

As in my previous post, I had promised, that I would write about some of the wonderful people and places that I have visited during my travels, this post is my first endevour to fulfill that promise.

I wanted this story to be the first, because it's a story of an incredible woman. This incident took place in the year 1998 in the month of April. I mention this story specifically, because there are so many women, and in so many different circumstances, and each have their own brave tales to tell... this is such a story, the story of Sarada, an ordinary woman, but incredible because of the circumstances she's in.

This story takes place in a small town in of Londa, more specifically, the Londa Railway Station... Londa is situated in the Belgaum district of Karnataka, India. It's a really beautiful town, with breathtaking views of the Sahyadris rising up. There are generally two types of people who come to the Londa station. The first are the trekkers who are interested in going up the Sahyadris, and the second group generally, change trains here for the further journey upto Goa. My family and I fell into the second group.

Back in the 1990's, Konkan railways, which connects Mumbai and Margao in Goa, did not have many trains in operation and as my father was being transferred from Jabalpur in Madhya Pradesh, taking the right connecting train was even more difficult... so we undertook a long journey, from Madhya Pradesh, to Mahrashtra to Karnataka and finally to Goa. Londa fell in our Karnataka section of the trip.

When the train stopped in Londa, very few people alighted. It was afternoon and the month of April. The summer sun was already making it's presence felt and there were very few porters available.

We were approached by one, who took a hard look at the number of cases we were carrying and asked us our destination. When we told him that we were taking a train from this station itself, and we merely needed to change the platform, he pointed out that there was a bridge to be crossed and that with the amount of luggage we had, he would charge at least 70 bucks.

Now Indians, and especially Bengalis, have an inherent habit of bargaining... no matter the money was being paid by the Indian Government, my parents and I promptly indulged in a bargain. The fellow, probably was feeling too sleepy... contrary to agreeing or disagreeing, as is the norm of a successful  bargaining, he simply left.

So here was, a family of four, stranded on a platform, with the summer sun beating down upon us, and in a few minutes it looked as if the entire station has gone on a siesta, except for us. There was not a single person milling around, not even stray dogs were found, the few stalls of books and paraphernalia had already closed with "lunch time" hanging on their downed shutters. The last departing porter gave us a reassuring advice, wait till the next train arrives and someone would be there to help us... well the next train that would arrive was the one we were supposed to take, so his advice was completely wasted on us... but we chose not to point it out to him.

As we were staring up at the stairs to the bridge, gathering up our luggage and planning on a strategy as to who would carry what, we met her... she was a frail looking woman, in a red sari, no footwear and a large red "bindi" on her forehead... she came up to us, and signaled with her hands, where we were headed.

 Our first impression was that she was a beggar, and thus consequently, we chose to ignore her. As my father picked up the first suitcase and started heading, she ran to my father, and started snatching it from his hand... we jumped up, thinking she was a mad woman, and my mother and I started screaming for help... then she started pleading to us, again with the signs to stop screaming... she painfully explained that she was a porter.

When we understood, what she was trying to convey, we were extremely taken aback, a woman porter, that too one who could not speak or hear... we didn't know whether to be impressed or suspicious...

We slowly started loading up the suitcases onto her head... when the limit of two cases was reached, my mother asked my father to take the other two, since she was so frail, we didn't really trust her to carry everything.... she again signaled, she was very able to carry the extra two suitcases, and they were also promptly loaded up...with four cases piled up on her head, and two duffel bags on her right arm, she slowly started to mount the stairs. I and my brother kept matching her pace, because we were sure she would topple over. She again signaled to me regarding which platform to go to, and I signaled back. When we reached our destination, she slowly unloaded the suitcases and the bags and waited. We weren't sure what we were supposed to do, and my father took out a 50 rupee note... she again signaled that she didn't want the money now, but when she would load the luggage on the train. We were surprised and really touched.

As then happens with all Indian families, we squatted on top of our luggage and waited for our train to come. She squatted on the floor nearby.

My mother, this is one trait I share with her... whatever the circumstances, we need to talk. My mother promptly started a conversation with her. Now it was the most strangest conversation, I have ever witnessed. No a single word was spoken between the two speakers, the entire conversation was through actions, yet the witnesses present could clearly understand what was being spoken.

What transpired from the conversation was as follows.

Her name was Sarada, she pointed at a Hindi tatoo on her arm to let us know of this fact, she was married, her husband was also a porter, infact the same one who had told us that there would be someone to help us... she had three children, and she helped her husband out in the business of pottering.

She looked after the noon shift, when there wasn't many trains and passengers, while her husband took a short nap. He would be back, she said in about an hour, and she would go to pick up her kids from school. She had three children, two daughters and one son and yes they all went to school. Her husband and her children could all speak and hear, only she couldn't. Her husband, she pointed out did not drink or beat her, as is the norm in most poor Indian families. When my mother pointed out that she too could take rest, instead of laboring in the hot syn, carrying such huge luggage... she explained to her, that she really believed in earning herself, and being independent and  in fact, it was her earnings, which made it possible for her children to attend schooling. She also pointed out that because both her husband and she earned, it has been possible for them to make a "pucca" house for themselves.This, she pointed out smiling, was an achievement,  as they were the only porters here in Londa to have one. We were stunned listening to her story.

In an era, (this was 1998, remember?) where women's lib was only a lip service, here was a woman, disable so as to speak of, but far more advanced and far more capable than, many quite able ones. She was poor, she couldn't even hear or speak, and yet here she was, doing a job, that in India, is quite clearly a man's domain. We could not hide our appreciation and respect for her.

Shortly our train came, and she again loaded each and every case, with care in our designated compartment and my father was so happy that he paid a hundred bucks to Sarada. Soon as the train left the station, we could see Sarada's red sari fluttering up in the wind as she slowly mounted up the stairs.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

The Immortals of Meluha: A Critical Review


Recently I finished reading one of the recent bestsellers, The Immortals of Meluha, by Amish.First of all kudos to the author for trying to deal with Hindu mythology and giving it the shape that would be interesting to the modern reader. Hindu mythology is a subject that very few Indian authors have tried to use in their story telling,much less to base their story on it. The fact that Amish has,goes a long way to say how our rich heritage could be used in the modern day and age. It is a very noble beginning, and I really hope we have many authors who would use this historical background to base their stories upon. We could recreate thousands of Da Vinci Codes, if we delved into our history and mythology deep enough.

Honestly, I felt I needed to write about the book, because, though it has captured the imaginations of many a readers, it would be grossly incorrect, if we were to believe that the author has tried to focus on the ancient and rich history of India. Sure, as a work of pure fiction, it is indeed good, but there are certain facts misrepresented as history of our land. It would be very unfair on my part as a reader, if I do not put out an unbiased view of the book, because even I really enjoyed how the story unfolds.

Let me first start by giving a brief synopsis of the story. The story, unfolds in the ancient land of India, known as Meluha, where reigns Emperor Daksha of the Suryavanshi clan. They are a highly civilized society where rules, guidelines and regulations are to an extent just. Their science, culture, tradition all are taken from the venerable Lord Ram, the proginetor of the Suryavanshi clan. These Suryavanshis are in constant fear of terrorist attacks from another clan, the Chandravanshis, who are exactly the opposite of them as in they adhere to no rules, regulations or guidelines. Their society isn't as civilized as the Suryanvanshis and they have now formed an ally with the "Nagas", the most heinous of all the tribes of India and together they want to steal the secret formula of "Somrasa", which Suryavanshis value as their holy drink.
Now there is a prophecy that a blue throated man from the lands of the "Sapt-Sindhu" would come and rescue the Suryavanshis. Enters Shiva, a tribal chieftain from the mountains of Kailasha, whose throat has turned blue upon consuming Somrasa, is he the prophetic one? Will he be able to deliver Suryavanshis from their problems and are Chandravanshis really the problem? Who are these Nagas? Are the Suryavanshis really as good as portrayed? For finding the answers to these questions, one has to read The Immortals of Meluha.

Now coming to the narrative style, Amish's style can never be called gripping, and cannot hold the attention of the reader. Another thing I quite disagreed with,is the occasional usage of swear words. They have been employed far too many times. The story has been weaved exceptionally well and the climax is really good though the end is kept wide open. Amish cleverly uses this book as a prequel to his next book, "The Secret of the Nagas". Kudos to Amish for knowing his historical facts well and cleverly using them to his advantage. The book can in no way be taken as a narrative of the rich ancient history of our land, but as a work of pure fiction. People reading this should bear it in mind that the author has grossly played with the historical facts and jumbled them up to present a very juvenile land of India.
Lastly it is a book, one should read as purely a work of fiction. Please do note that there are grossly misrepresented facts but yes, the storyline is good, some of the concepts given in it are extremely interesting and overall a good read, though I would not rate it as a "must read". Read it at our own leisure, for the simple pleasure of reading.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Maoist threat: Civil War in Bengal

West Bengal is being torn by civil war affecting mainly parts of rural Bengal. As if the cyclone Aila didn't cause enough harm by uprooting livelihood of many hundreds and thousands of poor villagers, the civil war is uprooting the very fabric of rural life in Bengal, none of the existing political parties in West Bengal is really interested in actually adressing the Maoist problem and the price for such indifference is being paid by the poor villagers. For many years these same Maoists were being supported and were being shielded by the ruling Communist Govt. going to the extent of supplying them with arms and ammunition taken from Police arsenal & now the same ruling coalition is facing the brunt of it's faulty policies. After the recent Lok Sabha election debacle it has begun to sit up and take notice of it's disastrous policies of retaining political power at any cost.

The main opposition Mamata Banerjee led Trinamool Congress is playing an even dangerous game.
It has long been known that Ms. Bannerjee has long wanted to take control of the West Bengal Govt and it's one of her most cherished desire to become the Chief Minister of the State, when the recent Lok Sabha Election showed that people are ready for a change, the Trinomool Congress started using the Maoists to further their political cause of replacing the ruling Left coalition. The PCPA is supported by the Trinomool Cong. and the atrocities being committed by them in the name of stopping the "Red threat" is actually to further both the Trinamool's and the Maoists' cause... it's indeed shameful and horrific to say the least. And in this political one upmanship, the poor people of rural Bengal is paying the price... they neither know the Left ideology, nor the Maoists' ideology nor do they have a clue as to what Ms. Banerjee wants. They are being killed, humiliated, raped, their houses are being set fire and their fields are being devastated... is anyone out there listening?

The so called Communists, the Maoists and Ms. Banerjee all of you who declare time and again in loud voices that they are for the "People of Bengal"... are you witnessing this silent genocide or do we need more bloodshed and tears to make you hear.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Jai Ho....!!!!!!

Many many congratulations to Mr. A.R. Rahman for attaining the distinction of being the only Indian to win 2 Oscars.And also heartiest congratulations to Mr. Danny Boyle and the cast and crew of Slumdog Millionaire.

It is a befitting reply to those who slammed the movie as 'Poverty porn'... it was said that all the movies which portray Indian poverty get accolades abroad...it was also said that poverty is the only thing which"sells".....to all these pessimists, either they haven't seen the movie or are far divorced from reality. As A.R Rahman said in his acceptance speech, "the film's message was one of eternal optimism".... it portrays the struggle of three orphans and their struggle for existence...yes poverty does exist in India and it is also true that all the films that have managed to cut ice with the broader audience has been on that track. But let's not take away the credits for a well made film. It is our misfortune that we haven't been able to make a film which portrays India's rich heritage and culture with equal aplomb as we have managed to depict poverty and malnutrition, though we may say in all "these films' " defense that they have essentially shown human trials and tribulations with poverty as their background which leads us to the question, why there haven't been movies which show the same human elements but in a different context.

That is because, sadly, right from the time when Mother India was nominated in the Foreign Films Category in the year 1958, poverty has been a matter of "necessary evil" for us, though now in the post liberalized India it has become a matter of "selective ignorance"... it's indeed sad to see movies still using that theme and making big bucks with the overseas audience.

But if we are to lay the blame on why the movie makers are making such movies it's the case of "pot calling the kettle black"....we have poverty and if movie makers use this background to show life's trials, who can we blame but us....for letting such gruesome poverty exist....and slamming others if they manage to portray the reality.....we turn away from it squeamishly for the sole reason because we can't face it.....so for the moment let's leave the poverty behind and rejoice in the cinematic brilliance that's "Slumdog Millioniare"...
JaiHo !!!

Image Courtesy : www.wikipedia.org

Reflection muses...

Language is the basis for recapturing experience...

- Cyhthia Selfae